Sticks & Stones

Until recently, my daughter had no use for girls. As a feminist, I kept trying to tell her how cool it is to be a girl, but she wasn't having any. She worshipped her big brother, and was only happy when she was playing whatever boy thing he was into. Now that she's in first grade, things are changing. She has her first Best Friend.

Oh, I remember those feelings. The possessiveness, the loyalty, the anger, the love notes. It's how girls practice all those relationship things that drive boys crazy later on. Katie and Alyssa do it all: they're in the same class, partners on the jump rope team, seatmates on the bus. They're both eager to have their first sleepover, but we haven't been able to schedule it so far. I'm sure the giggling will last into the wee hours. Mine did.

My sister Janet had her first best friend in first grade, too. Kay and Janet had chemistry--they recognized their kindred spirithood from the first day. In the same class, eating lunch together, sharing secrets and smiles. They were anticipating a sleepover, too, and were excited to ask their parents when it could happen.

Kay went home to ask her daddy, the sheriff of Sumter County, if she could spend the night with Janet. When he heard where Janet lived--that detested, communist Koinonia place--he told Kay in no uncertain terms: not only could she not spend the night with her friend, she was never to speak to Janet again.

The next morning, when the two little heads came together at school, Kay shared the answer, and both girls were confused and heartbroken. After that, Janet's best friend in Sumter County was a brick. Literally, a brick.

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words will never hurt me.

So they say.